That Little Conversation
by pokemon fan 98
Summary: Iris remembers the little conversation she had with Caitlin: the one that helped her decide to talk to Barry about her feelings for him. It helped a lot. Now, Iris can see Caitlin has something on her mind. Something is bothering her, but she won't say what. Iris decides to have a little talk with her, to return the favor. Caitlin and Iris friendship, set in the season two finale.


**A/N: So I saw a clip from season two recently, with a conversation between Iris and Caitlin, just before Iris tells Barry she cares about him. You can see their friendship start to grow in that quick talk. I liked the conversation, and decided to write about them having another one.**

* * *

" _Caitlin, do you believe in destiny?"_

 _She smiles softly, but her eyes express only sadness. "Maybe for you."_

* * *

Iris remembers.

She remembers that little conversation clearly, even after losing Barry's dad and defeating Zoom. They're celebrating at the West house, but Caitlin doesn't seem to be celebrating with them. Iris saw her as she walked to the door, and the scientist was apart from everyone else: close enough to be present, but far enough away to effectively be alone. As Iris sits on the porch that night, she knows things are finally starting to come together for her and Barry, and is dying to start thinking about their future together. But a part of her can't stop thinking about that quick conversation with Caitlin, weeks ago, and the way the scientist has been acting recently. And that, maybe, the scientist needs help, but doesn't know how to ask for it.

"Barry," Iris says, "do you think Caitlin's okay?"

He seems surprised by the subject change (a second ago they were talking about when he first moved in with her and her dad). His gaze moves back towards the house. "She's tough, Iris. I think she'll be fine."

"She's just seemed so lonely lately."

Barry's hand finds hers. "Everyone's a little lonely sometimes," he says quietly.

She nods and rests her head against his shoulder, letting herself be comforted by him. It's not selfish to enjoy a moment with her… what did Barry even classify as for her? Boyfriend? Partner? Love of her life? She isn't sure there's a label for what the two of them have.

Actually, she realizes she _can_ think of _one_ :

Destiny.

So she lets herself stop thinking about how Caitlin seems lonely, and how Barry's grieving his dad, and just enjoys the fact that she's holding hands with the man she loves. And for a few moments, everything is perfect.

* * *

It's when they go back inside, a few minutes later, that she feels guilty again. Cisco is talking to Harry, Wally, and Joe in the living room. Caitlin is still standing by the doorway to the dining room, a distant expression on her face. Iris decides it's time for another little chat with her. This time, though, Caitlin will be the one being helped.

"Hey," Iris says as she approaches. She's careful not to startle the scientist, but her words still seem to surprise her.

Caitlin half smiles and shakes her head. "Hey. Sorry, I was a million miles away."

"It's okay. We've had a long day."

There's a pause between them, and Iris looks at Caitlin carefully. "I just want to make sure you know you can talk to me, if you need to," she says. "If there's something on your mind, or if you just wanna vent… I'm here."

Iris can't really read Caitlin's thoughts. She's never been able to, really. But she can see something soften in her eyes, and when Caitlin speaks, the warmth in her voice is unmistakable. "Thanks, Iris."

Iris starts to smile. "What are friends for?" She wants to bite her tongue after saying it. That didn't sound nearly as casual as she meant it to.

She can see that Caitlin doesn't want to say anything tonight, and tells herself not to push her. So _she_ talks, and tells her about those few minutes on the porch with Barry. "I wanted to thank you, for helping me realize it's okay to go through with this," she says after the spark notes version. "It's not betraying Eddie, or surrendering to something inevitable. It's my choice." She looks at Barry and feels warmth in her core. "Barry is my choice."

Caitlin is silent, and when Iris looks up, she's shocked to see tears swimming in the scientist's eyes. She reaches a hand out to touch Caitlin's arm, but stops before making contact. "Caitlin, what's wrong?" she asks, concerned.

Caitlin breathes out low, and when she meets Iris's worried eyes, her expression is more neutral – more neutral, but Iris can still read it plainly enough. Sadness doesn't fade that quickly. "You just made me think of Ronnie," she says, with a bittersweet smile. "I was already thinking of him, but…"

Any warmth Iris had been feeling is replaced with a cold, uneasy mixture of pity and sympathy. She was so stupid, to not realize it sooner: of course Caitlin would be thinking of Ronnie. Iris had thought about Eddie a few times recently, as she realized she was ready to give her devotion fully to Barry. Caitlin had to have been thinking about Ronnie the whole time she was getting to know Jay… and when she thought she lost Jay, feeling like she was reliving losing Ronnie…

"Oh, Caitlin," Iris says, fully placing her hand on her arm.

"It's okay," Caitlin says. "Really. I just miss him a lot some days."

"That's understandable. You loved him."

"Yeah," she says, smiling a little wider. "I did." Caitlin looks at her and almost seems like she's about to laugh. "Some way to celebrate beating Zoom, huh?"

"Nights like this make you want to be with the ones you love," Iris says, unintentionally glancing at Barry. "That doesn't change if the loved ones are gone. It just takes some of the joy out of it."

Caitlin quickly moves forward and hugs her. Iris is surprised, but happily so. "Thank you," Caitlin says when they separate.

"Take it from a woman who's been through the same thing," Iris says with a trace of amusement, echoing the words Caitlin had said to her weeks before.

Caitlin smiles, no doubt remembering that little conversation, and Iris is relieved that the scientist's grief seems to be fading. Not permanently, but it looks like she's deciding to let herself enjoy the night, instead of focusing on the life she can't have with the man she loved.

It's not something they talk about – that both Iris and Caitlin lost their significant others that day – but it does give them something in common. Something only the two of them can understand, really.

"We should check on the others," Caitlin says. "I think they're planning something for tomorrow."

"Yeah, I thought I heard Cisco say something about a go-kart…" They look at each other and start to laugh as they walk over, and as Iris sits on the arm of Barry's chair, she feels good.

Barry is holding her hand. Cisco, Harry, and Wally are discussing building go-karts. Joe is smiling behind a beer. And Caitlin is starting to evaluate the guys' plan, with an amused expression that says she doesn't think it's going to work.

Everyone is here.

Iris squeezes Barry's hand, letting herself relax again and enjoy herself.

Everyone is good.

 **A/N: This could have happened, and in my head, might have, if Barry hadn't created Flashpoint. Iris and Caitlin might have made a stronger friendship earlier in the series, instead of it really starting in season four. This is one way it may have played out. I hope you liked it.**


End file.
